How To Overcome Communication Problems in Relationships
How To Overcome Communication Problems in Relationships
Communication problems in relationships are so common that no matter how great you and your sweetie get along, youre bound too run into some mis-communication, somewhere along the line. The good news is, with the right approach, these problems usually arent too hard to solve.
Bridge the gender divide
Men and women approach relationships in distinctly different ways. Without and open mind, its all too easy to write the opposite gender off as illogical or even start thinking of their differences as childish or petty. The fact is neither gender is perfectly logical. Taking some time to learn about exactly how the opposite gender looks at love matters can help you avoid a lot of problems in relationships.
Listen thoughtfully
Dont forget that youre one half of the communication problem. When youve been together for a while, you might begin to think you know what your partner is going to say. Unless you have ESP, though, youll get a lot farther by actually hearing your partner out. When sweetie tells you something, restate what they said to make sure you understood correctly and let them know you heard.
Release the need for blame
When one of you has a problem, the relationship has a problem and its in both your best interests to work it out peacefully. Instead of going around in circles trying to decide whose fault it is, focus on how youre going to solve it.
Likewise, try to avoid blaming your partner for your overall mood. Specific issues like When you flirt with other people, I feel rejected. are fine, but sweeping statements like You make me miserable. or You stress me out. are taking it too far.
Stick to the facts
When trying to speak over problems in relationships, dont bring up any thing you cant prove. Instead, stay with what cant be argued like your own feelings and what your partner already concurs they do. For example, saying You disrespected me in front of my friends. can be argued because standards of respect differ. On the other hand, saying I was embarrassed when you told Dave you dont think I should ask for a raise. isn't only unarguable, but also gets your point across more clearly.
Be frank, but kind
Youre not doing anyone any favors by taking a put up and shut up attitude to problems in relationships. All you end up doing is allowing wounds to fester and they can eventually reach the point where theyll never heal at all. Instead, Talk your mind when you have a problem, but do so with gentleness, kindness, and respect. Remember, your partner probably isnt trying to injured or annoy you and may be pretty upset to hear youre unhappy.
Be a friend, not a coach
Chances are, your partner isnt with you because theyre hoping you can correct all their bad habits and personality flaws. Youre not their parent, teacher, coach, or boss. Youre their friend and lover.
You may think youre giving constructive criticism, but your partner might think your love or respect for them has diminished because of this one Tiny flaw they have. Instead of criticizing, encourage improvement by giving your partner some positive feedback when they do something you really like.
There, that doesnt sound too hard, does it? These techniques may be simple, but they really do work to solve communication problems in relationships. Give them a try.
This entry was posted on Thursday, January 7th, 2010 at 11:02 pm and is filed under Online Dating. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.